Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Brave boy

Yesterday I received a phone call from the principal of our elementary school. She was calling to let me know that my third grader was in her office. She further explained that he was upset and she wanted me to know why.
(I don't know about you, but my brain was coming up with all sorts of scenario's while I waited for the explanation)
Seems he was in the bathroom at the same time as some fifth graders. Apparently there was some horseplay on the behalf of said fifth grade boys. They were playing in the soap. Smearing it on the walls, throwing it at each other, flicking it on the mirrors ect.
Our third grader asked them to please stop, they were making a mess. (future police officer?) They laughed in his face, taunted him, and kept him from washing his own hands by threatening to get soap and water all over him. Something along the lines of him being "just a third grader, and what was he going to do about it, they were fifth graders".
Our brave boy went straight to the principals office instead of back to his own classroom and told her what was going on. Her response? This is where it gets good. She takes him with her to the different 5th grade classrooms for him to pick out the boys. Problem #1. How many classes were disturbed for this? Second, here is this scared third grade boy, who has already been picked on, now having to make a up in your face in front of their peers identification! Can you believe it? OH MY!
Brave little man manages to point them out. Wait, it gets better!
Now the three boys and our third grader march back down the hall all the way to the principal's office. Can you imagine that walk? Sigh.
Once in the principals office, she makes our boy recount what he saw and has him point to which boy did what. Then said boy has a time to deny or admit his guilt. Tell me, what do you think is happening here? Denial was the play decided upon by two of the boys. One of them outright admitted to messing around. He was one involved, but not the main culprit. Eventually the other two were given a "write up" which basically means a note sent home to their parents.
As soon as the 5th graders left her office, our boy sat himself down in one of the principals chairs and just cried. Cried, relief that it was over and cried over the possibility of another encounter in the future. The principal made a big deal about how brave he was for following through. As our boy made his way back to his classroom he wanted to be sure from me that instead of riding the bus home, he would be picked up by me. No problem, I assured him.
I was upset. I just wish I had gotten there before he had to go identify them in front of their classes. Poor thing. Hopefully he doesn't have a bulls eye on his back for the next two weeks of school.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Heartache of a parent

I think one of the biggest struggles a parent deals with is watching your child fall short. You try, you show them how to do something. You give them time. Others give your child a chance to grow, maybe this will work. More time, then time is up. Tears, pleading, but the bottom line is.. time is up. Circumstances of the choices we make always come around. Sometimes we can catch them for our kids, keep them from the pain, sometimes we can dull the pain so it isn't so severe. But man, when we can't and they have to learn the lesson. How hard it is to watch this happen.
Wow. What an ache. This ache doesn't come around much, but when it does, you recognize it. Some examples are, when you have to take that report card home, and you know, you know that it isn't your best, the feeling when you have done something wrong and you are just waiting for the other shoe to fall, the feeling you get when you glance in your rear view mirror, and see the lights flashing.. you are being pulled over, What about the disappointment in someone you loves face reflecting back at you? The ache of love not returned?
I hate to see either of our boys hurt. Even if they have done something to deserve the hurt. Man, the ache. I would willingly take it on, just to ease that pain. The pain of learning a lesson.
One day they will realize that not only do they feel the pain of seeing that disappointment or having to redo an assignment, maybe extra work, or even the pain of punishment, that worse than that is that their actions - well - they affect others too.
The more of life I live, the more I truly see Christ's love for us. Oh, the big picture. We think we know, we may even truly think we are doing our best, deep down where we keep stuffing the truth, we know, we KNOW we have not done our best. We have spat in the face of our Savior, just the same as if we were there the day they nailed him to the cross.
As I feel the love and ache for my children, how much more so does Christ weep for us? OH, how much HE LOVES US, OH, how much HE LOVES US.