Bullies

I'll take a moment here to focus on a ray of sunshine before I address the little raincloud in our neighborhood. Our neighborhood is pretty unique in that we all communicate. We help one another with various projects, borrowing tools, holiday cookouts and various get togethers. We have attended funerals together and celebrated births and graduations together also! So, when a problem happens, the group gets together and helps the one who needs it. We have had a suicide, death, and job loss where everyone pooled their money to help this family stay in their home through the holidays. So, bottom line.. its a great neighborhood.

However we have a child quickly bypassing "ugly behavior" and living/acting out as the bully.

"Bully: A person who is habitually cruel or overbearing, especially to smaller or weaker people."  This is Webster's Dictionary definition of what it means to be a bully. In the last month or so, ugly actions have ooozed their way into our neighborhood.

There is a family that has severe issues going on which unfortunately are affecting the rest of us. Their son, for one. He constantly tries to divide the neighborhood boys against each other. He creates all sorts of turmoil, throwing bicycles and ballcaps into the pond, calling everyone names from out in the street, and as of late, some small theft and destruction of property. 

When he is approached about this behavior, or caught in the act, (as I was able to do), the explanation we get out of said child is that he has "anger issues and is looking for a way to vent."  Sidenote: I have a suggestion to give him a way to vent, its called work. Something productive to do with his time! This boy suffers from lack of parental attention, and so the rest of us in the neighborhood are dealing with this child.
Earlier this week, I came home from work to find several of my potted plants on the back porch broken, (just one pot out of the bunch is broken), and lying on the ground. There had been no storms, no winds. Then came news from our youngest that the bully was mad at me for not letting him come over to play so he snuck into our backyard and destroyed a few things. (he couldn't come play because our boys don't get to have other children over to play unless an adult is home, or a neighbor can hang out and keep everyone safe, our boys have to have their homework done first, and several afternoons are spent involved in various after school activities).  At first, I just went out back and cleaned up, a variety of emotions swirling in my mind. After all, Brian didn't see this bully do this, but after checking with other parents, they didn't witness this act either. So until I have proof, I can do nothing.
There is a saying that it takes a  village to raise a child. I believe that is true. Sweetie and I can't watch the boys activities all the time, so we rely on the parents of the boys they play with to enforce rules upon them while on their property. If the boys can't behave, they don't get to play. We have sent other children home, as ours have been sent back home themselves.
Bullies today are such a different sort than in the past. Most disagreements that I recall were settled before/ after school, then everyone played together later that same evening or that week. Today, the world is different, with bombings and shootings being played out on our nightly news. With this difference we must be active parents, neighbors, and friends.
In this situation one parent is absent, and the other? Well she doesn't want to deal with her children's actions, so she just gives excuses and nothing gets done. With some direction from the rest of us, this bully can learn to deal without hurting others, or their property and become a working member of society. Until then, I will commit to not only being watchful and involved, but also praying protection for the boys.